Hi Gilbert,

I don’t know whether this will help or is it bringing me to anywhere but I just need some professional advice.

I’m Shirley  and only  20 years old.

Though I’m young in my age but definitely not young in mind. Sometimes I feel like a 30-year-old woman living in a 20-year-old body.

I grew up in a very unfortunate home environment  and currently I’m the only breadwinner of the family. I’m staying with one  older brother and a younger brother. My parents were divorced when I was still in primary school.

I’m  staying with my mom but unfortunately she is now  in Taiwan serving her sentence. She was caught  smuggling heroin out of Taiwan and got detained there. She will be in jail for 2 years plus and  only   release near end of 2015.

My older brother is 26  years’ old and has being  unemployed  since  completing  national service at age  21 years old. HE ISN’T HANDICAP OR HAVING ANY DISABILITIES. But I think he is just too lazy to work.

We are not in good terms for many years mainly because the previous year he stole my savings which I hid at home. It is very depressing to have a “THIEF” in my own house.

I have been taking care of all the  expenses and bills for  the household for  the past 2 years ever since my mom got into jail.

My biggest role is to take good care of my little brother. He is 14 years old and  he is a very nice boy. Now he is in the puberty stage for a 14-year-old boy and I got to look out for him even more.

GIven my age, I should be studying my ass off and getting a good cert or something but fate has being really cruel to me.

Now I’m basically unemployed  for 2 months and I dont know which way to go. Previously,  I  worked in the  mobile sales line and now have I quitted from  the job due to a reshuffle of the company… or I should say I needed a break.

I’m still looking out for a job and I think I am better working in direct sales.

I don’t know if I want to go for a much established professional career cos I dont think I am  confident enough to  pull it off.

I would really love to see myself  successful in the coming years and have the ability to earn more money and take care of the house. I just feel so lost and depressed.

Thank you for taking time to read this mail and may God bless you.

Sincerely,

Shirley

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Hi Shirley,

Thanks for your mail and frankness – you are truly matured beyond your years.

You must be feeling tired also assuming the role of the bread winner at home for someone so young.

It must be tough for you.

I remembered shoudering the household expenses when I was only 22 years old – my dad passed away due to cancer.

My mum later came out to work to split the household expenses. I had a younger brother who was still studying then.

Nevertheless, adverse circumstances have a way of moulding us and very often, we will adjust though sometimes we may feel unjustified and frustrated.

Do you have any relatives that you can talk to or do you still talk to your dad?

It looks like he is not in the picture right now or for a long time.

There is actually quite alot of work that requires direct sales and it has unlimited income as it depends on our own efforts.

I did insurance work before for five years and though I dont have a monthly income I earned much more than my regular work income before.

However, I think insurance sales have an age criterion of 21 years old and above.

At your age, its good to explore abit about what you actually want.

Sometimes, one needs to work a while before we know what we are good at.

Can I also refer a good volunteer career coach to speak with you?

All our services are free of charge.

Take care and stay strong.

I also seek your permission to post this mail on my blog so that we can learn from one another.

I will leave out your name and details to protect your privacy.

Let me know and stay in touch.

Regds,

Gilbert

PS: Shirley has just  emailed me saying that her previous boss in the telco has asked her to return to the sales team – Gilbert.