This article appeared as a comment under “Middle aged unemployed engineer harbouring suicidal thoughts“
jobless Engineer says:
I feel the same man …I am washing the dishes and babyseat all day … and it is hard … very hard to know in your heart that when you buy a candy for your kid .. .you have to ask for the money (well at least in theory) from someone else.
I feel like losing the pride and credit I have gain all these years .. and feel worthless … a big failure and yes suicide is always just a hand reach away … the only thing holding me back is my daughter and spiritual beliefs I have …
But it is hard .. hang on to it man and try not to be too close to your thoughts on suicide .. it is soothing but not productive .. try sports. Thats what I do when my wife comes home - I go for my exercise and sometimes walk for miles and make myself tired to the limit I can’t think anymore .. . but do not let yourself be occupied by suicidal thoughts too much .. . try to find a mentor.. . someone whom you can talk to and listen to you (the latter part is more important).
Try music .. that helps me alot .. . but you have to deal with it .. . be a man.
_________________________
Hi Jobless engineer
I saw your comment on my blog just now – www.transitioning.org.
I felt that perhaps you may need some support from our organisation.
We provide online counselling and career coaching support.
Do let me know if you need our assistance.
I commend you for taking up exercise to psyche yourself up – I did that when I was jobless and it was my life-saver.
Joblessness can be a drain on the esteem and very harmful if we let those negative thoughts enshrine us.
However, many people who have gone through unemployment have emerged much stronger than before and have recovered well to lead normal lives.
The key is not to give up and keep on pressing forward. Staying positive is of paramount importance here though it’s easier say than done.
I would suggest that you have a heart-to-heart talk with your wife who may be clueless as to what to do with your emotions.
Letting her know how you feel will certainly help in the relationship.
I also suggest that you talk through the finances with your wife as it could be a key issue moving forward. No man wants to be seen as relying on the wife for livelihood and its a sure stab to the man’s ego.
You can either ask for a small monthly allowance to get by or simply a soft loan with the intention to repay her back when you are back to work. This way you don’t feel that you are depending on her for your finances indirectly.
I know how you feel as I have been there before – 18 months of joblessness in a relationship with a corporate wife. It was the lowest period of my life and I lost all my self esteem and confidence.
I can only said that its sheer hell but yet the whole experience has toughened me up alot and more importantly humbled me in the process for greater works ahead.
I started a website to support those who are jobless and am proud to say that we are doing rather well.
Take care and never give up.
We are here for you.
Regds,
Gilbert
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Suicidal Person: Admitting in public your IQ is slipping will undermine your job search….should you choose to live.
Be a social worker….and help others who lost their way, yes it pays little but being useful keeps you out of ditch..
Write a book: depressed persons may sometimes
write a witty book and sometimes sell it….writing
a book is a gamble….gamble that you will finish the book and a gamble someone will pay to read it…but
GO DOWN GAMBLING…
Not everyone who chooses suicide is Mentally Ill.
There are a lot of things wrong with the world.
If you believe in reincarnation, you can come back.
If you believe in heaven, you can look forward to heaven. If you believe in Jesus, Jesus would not like the idea you don’t value your own life, because lots of lives are valuable…
ME
I made a crude remark on a city bus that
my thick glasses were bullet proof….
ALERT A blind man said:
“I would like to have the vision that YOU HAVE..”
Maybe someone wants the vision and IQ you have
maybe someone has less than you…
There are also other options. How’s abt teaching.
One of my previously unemployed engineer friend started with a part-time teaching job and became a full-time lecturer after 2 years. My another unemployed engineer friend is giving private tuitions to secondary school students.
Look at the bright side of live and pls delete yr suicidal though from yr mind and cheer up.
Whether you believe it or not –
all humans belonging to earth already had many past-life experiences.
Some have 100, 300, 500 and even 1000 past-life expressions on earth.
Human cannot remember all past-life records because earth is at lower vibration.
You planned your own life before your incarnation on earth.
Every individual do have their own life purpose.
Suicide is a terrible thing to do.
One life is lost and wasted opportunity for spiritual growth.
Those went through suicide had returned to the Other Side – higher dimension.
They can reincarnate to complete their unfinished lessons.
There are many universal laws for planet earth that you know nothing about.
Earth is the only planet with the universal law of free will.
There are billions of unseen forces/divine helpers at work for earth.
There are millions of awakened soul here on earth.
I am just one of them and encourage you to continue your most precious life now.
You must continue to love your wife and daughter.
Your daughter needs a loving father – that you can bring joy and happiness.
At 47 you are probably getting your dose of Age bias. 50 is the age they dump us. With only 12 years before you are 60 do you really want to spend the rest of your life as a wage slave ? Think about it. Corporate America wants a cheap 22 year old who will work 60 hours for a cheap wage. One guy I know started his own company after getting the age bias treatment at 40! He now makes a lot more than any salary job.
Thanks for putting this together – that is the great post for the ones from us with our heads buried inside keyboard all day.