Support Site for The Unemployed & Underemployed
Friday April 25th 2014

Middle aged unemployed engineer harbouring suicidal thoughts

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I just saw this website today.  I am a 47 year old male who lost my engineering job 5 years ago. I attempted to make the best of it by reversing roles with my wife until my only daughter reached school age, but have found that despite the large amount of skills that I have accumulated that no-one in the engineering field wants to hire me for any reason.   I am not able to obtain service jobs due to being considered overqualified.  I have take some courses to improve my overall skills base, but that has also not changed my situation at all.   I am too young to be considered human garbage.. the main thing affecting me is being made to feel superfluous and worthless… all I am doing with my life is washing dishes for my wife and hoping for a better day. And suicide is never far from my thoughts.

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11 Responses to “Middle aged unemployed engineer harbouring suicidal thoughts”

  1. sna says:

    Hi,

    Pls don’t ever comtemplate suicide,think of the pain it will bring to your family. Your predicament is not unique, there are many like you, given the current situation in Singapore. You seriously have to think about an alternative career. But whatever your situation is, NEVER EVER COMTEMPLATE SUICIDE.

  2. ahkong says:

    The engineer situation is very common in Singapore as a result of PAP govt policies. The govt under PAP ought to be blamed as under LHL we are on the decline.

  3. vincent says:

    HI,

    have you thought about your family back there, what happen if you die, what will happen to them? maybe your wife will remarried and someone father your kids? maybe? but put yourself in their shoes and think how will they feel? thou i can’t help you much maybe ever consider looking for other jobs? let your ego go and find something else, after all you still human being rite? i used to wash dishes for my family til i land myself a job. think of Dr cai situtation his is the best!

    cheers

    Vincent

  4. jobless Engineer says:

    feel the same man …I am washing the dishes and babyseat all day .. and it is hard .. very hard to know in you heart that when you buy a candy for your kid .. you have to ask for the money ( well.. atleast in theory ) from someone else. I feel loosing the pride and credit I have gain all these years .. and feel worthless ,, a big failure and yes suicide is always just a hand reach away .. the only thing is holding me is my doughter and spiritual beliefs I have ..
    but it is hard .. hang on to it man and try not to be too close to your toughts on suicide .. it is soothing but not productinve .. try sports . that what I do when my wife comes home I go to exercise or walk for miles and make myself tired to the limit I can not think to anything anymore .. but do not let yourself to be occupide by suicide thought .. try to find a mentor.. someone how can talk to you and you can listen ( the latter part is more important )
    try music .. that helps alot .. but you have to deal with it .. be a man

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  6. Colm says:

    Hey, I am a project manager/engineer from Ireland, lost my job went through the same crap, moved to canada, leaving my family in Ireland, had a good job lost it again, cried for 2 days, i move couches once a week, have the same thoughts but definitely the answer to all this for me is extreme amounts of exercise, to the point of exhaustion as mentioned above and aim all your thoughts on creating the perfect human speciman, we are not all about using our brains, keep the faith dude, never ever do it their is no future in killing yourself!!

  7. TN Man says:

    Those thoughts are not productive especially coming from someone who obviously has a lot to offer. Being over qualified means that employers are intimidated by you and don’t know how to motivate you.
    Here are some new ideas I am reviewing. Do you like teaching? There are many universities and schools looking for folks like us to share our experience and knowledge. There are also tutoring jobs both locally in person and on-line via the web.
    Contract firms such as Aerotek hire guys like you and I and if you watch the pay scale they often pay well. The draw back is you may have to go to the job instead of it being just around the corner.
    Go into business for yourself as a consultant. have several friends who have done this successfully!

  8. Nats says:

    5 years is too long. There must be something else more than just being overqualified, etc. In anycase, I am an out of work IT guy. I am a week short of my 1st full yr of unemployment but suicide is NEVER in my thoughts because death is the ONLY thing that is guaranteed in life, unemployment is NOT. So, as as long as you don’t sit on your ass and sulk all day, you will bound to be employed again.

  9. deadman says:

    Its my first 3 weeks being unemployed. I also have a lot of qualifications. Most of my friends got jobs – even ones not as qualified as me. I’ve been applying to jobs for 8 months (because i knew my most recent contract was about to end). Been to a couple of interviews but not jobs. I’m definitely gonna kill myself at some point. It’s only a matter of time.

  10. vince says:

    deadman,
    3 weeks is nothing compared to me – yrs. LOL…
    If you are local, I suggest 1) visit COM care center, phone numbers is at most HDB notice board. 2) Talk to the doctor.
    I’ve tried the above two, and didn’t really benefit much from it, but I do get some advices and experience. Seeing the doctor is going to cost you some money, but if you feel that you are really down, you can try talking to the doctor. The meds have side effects. Don’t visit local depression nets, if you want to feel well. a lot of cranks, and some angels.

    I’ve read some books at the library. Particularly about depression, anxiety disorders and various mental diseases and Psychology( basic ones). Self help books from some indian gurus. and some diet books as I was feeling no energy. I didn’t have much philosophy lessons back in school days.Maybe you can find some tips in philosophy books, but some are full of crap. and also religion. I’m buddhist but also partly agnostic. I recommend this free booklet to buddhists, that is free at Bright hill temple. Title: “How to Overcome your Difficulties” by Ven Dr.K.Sri Dhammananda, also available free online by using google search, but not sure if anyone can find it. Also this book “Why Worry?” “How to Live Without Fear and Worry” from the same author, available free online I think, or at the temple, definitely have. Other religions, I can’t help sorry as I do not know much about those. Agnostics and atheists, can’t help too. I study Charles Darwin’s evolution theories and try to use the theories to understand our living world.
    Take up a hobby, grow plants, keep some fish. Its therapeutic.

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