Support Site for The Unemployed & Underemployed
Sunday January 21st 2018

Counsellor’s Response To A Retrenched Reader

up since 4am .. could not sleep

Ever since I was out of job the first mind buggering issue was finances.
What ever I spend I now have to thing not twice but three times.

There is no more dinning out at restaurants or rather cut back to once a week from 3 times a week. Stop driving out and take thepublic transport etc.

This has reduce lots of personal expenses.

Tomorrow is my wife’s birthday. This year she is going to get shortchanged … no more flowers delivered to her office it will comefrom the market, no more fine dining and her present … .is going to be less expensive.

Feel so guilty about it that I could not provide her some form of happiness but had to conserve some financial resources to ride out at least another 6 mths or so.

Interviews are hard to come by.

My area of specialization meant little opportunities out there.
I have send out over 50 resumes but no responce so far.
Nowadays it becomes more desperate and I dont want to wait for the headhunter or job placement agency to respond but I would call them instead.

Luckily there is some daily routine in the morning, as I now take the bus with wife to town and I now  work at my friend’s hawker stall.

Imagine from an executive to a hawker …. earning $5 an hr with only 4 hrs work a day.
It actually is good to kill some time and take my mind off instead of being at home.

what a drastic change since 30 days ago …. and counting

Ivan (name changed to protect identity of reader)

Counsellor’s Response

Hi Ivan

Beneath the cloud of negative circumstances that you are going through, I also see that you are taking positive steps to manage it, though is tough going and out of your ‘normal’ style.

And your willingness to work at a hawker stall for $5 an hour speaks much of your resilience! So kudos to yourself!!

Well, as for happiness you want to give to your wife, I believe it comes in much more than just flowers order from the florist, fine dining and expensive presents . To have it come from the market and with your personal touch would mean much more …

Some of these things are good to have but not a determinant of happiness and family warmth.

Not having a job and being anxious about the future is normal and just human nature. Unfortunately it does not help to better the situation. However, you may want to change your coping strategy, like doing positive self-talk.

I do not know your previous working experience and interests, and so not able to discuss other possible job opportunities you could explore.


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One Response to “Counsellor’s Response To A Retrenched Reader”

  1. Roy Ong says:

    Hi Ivan,

    While your situation is sad, I like to offer you an alternative.

    Instead of feeling down after sending out your resumes and wait for replies. Why not spend the time doing something constructive?

    Have you had an idea or project that you want to execute but you lack resources like manpower or funding?

    Well, visit this crowd source and crowd funding website: and sign up as a Pioneer.

    Alternative, you might just want to sign up as an active advocate so that if other Pioneers who are interested in executing their projects. They may need your expertise.


    Roy Ong

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